Forgiveness. What does it really mean? I think it’s something that we’ve all struggled with at some point. I did some searching and found lots of different definitions, but this one really hit home for me:
Forgiveness is giving up my right to hurt you, for hurting me.
That definition really speaks to the struggle that goes on inside your head and your heart when someone wrongs you and you need to forgive them. It also highlights the fact that forgiveness is a choice, not a feeling. Forgiving doesn’t mean that you no longer feel the hurt. It means that you’ve decided not to dish it out in return. Maybe that’s what makes forgiveness so powerful.
Ultimately, forgiveness is birthed out of love – agape love. Wikipedia says that agape love is divine, unconditional, self-sacrificing, active, volitional, and thoughtful love. It also describes “agape” as “an intentional response to promote well-being when responding to that which has generated ill-being.” Agape love is a 1 Corinthians 13 kind of love. It’s the kind of love that we experience when we receive forgiveness from our heavenly Father.
Forgiveness can be a scary thing. But, that perfect love – that agape love – can remove fear. 1 John 4: 17-18 (The Message) says, “God is love. When we take up permanent residence in a life of love, we live in God and God lives in us. This way, love has the run of the house, becomes at home and mature in us, so that we’re free of worry on Judgment Day – our standing in the world is identical with Christ’s. There is no room in love for fear. Well-formed love banishes fear. Since fear is crippling, a fearful life... is one not yet fully formed in love.”
There’s no question about it – Forgiveness is hard. In fact, it’s almost impossible without God’s love at work in your life. But, when true forgiveness is offered and received, it’s a powerful thing. More on that next time…
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