The Dream

I believe in the sanctity of life – all life – male, female, black, white, rich, poor, young, old, born, unborn.  I believe that life is sacred.  It is to be valued and protected.  I believe that life comes from our creator God and that all of us are created in His image.  Therefore, all of us are valuable.  I believe that life begins at the point of conception when God breathes his spirit into the very fiber of the cells in a mother’s womb.

It grieves me to live in a world where life is not valued – where gun violence is rampant, abuse is a regular occurrence, the death penalty is enforced, and where it is legal to destroy the life of an unborn baby right up until the minute before it is ready to enter the world.

I cannot understand how we can simultaneously fight with everything we have to save the life of a baby that is born prematurely at 23 weeks while across town we give permission to destroy the life of another baby that is still in the womb at 23 weeks.  How is one of these considered to be a baby - a life to be valued and saved - while the other one is “just a fetus” that can be thrown away because it isn’t really a baby yet?  I just don’t understand the logic…

But, that isn’t really the point that I want to make.  Instead, I want to share a story – one that is meant to encourage and bring hope to those who have lost a child – whether to miscarriage or stillbirth or even to abortion.  Those lives – however brief – matter.  They matter to us and they matter to God.  I’m sure of it.

How can I be so sure?  First, scripture tells us it’s true.  Psalm 139:13-6 says:

“You (God) made all the delicate, inner parts of my body  and knit me together in my mother’s womb.  Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!     Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.  You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion,     as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.  You saw me before I was born.     Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out   before a single day had passed.”

But, I also have a more personal story that I want to share.  You see, we lost our second baby to a miscarriage.  It happened quickly – at just about 5 weeks – just days after we found out we were expecting.  We were sad, but we didn’t really dwell on it.  And, for the most part, I buried the whole experience in the recesses of my mind – which is how I tend to deal with grief.

Now, fast forward about 16 years – to an evening just a few months ago.  I had one of the most vivid dreams that I have ever had.  I usually don’t remember my dreams, but this one is etched into my memory.  I still replay it in my mind, and every image is crystal clear.  I believe that God still speaks to us in dreams, and I am sure that this dream was given to me by God.

In the dream, my husband and I were in an old country store in the mountains.  We were there with a little blond-haired boy who appeared to be about 7 or 8 years old.  He was wide-eyed with wonder and had a huge smile on his face.  We walked through the store with him looking at toys and outdoor gear.  We checked out the UNC sweatshirts and filled up bags with candy from the bins in the store.  As I watched us in the store with this little boy, he seemed familiar, but I couldn’t place his identity.  I kept thinking, “Who is this sweet child?  Do I know him?”

I woke up abruptly and started to pray, asking God what the dream meant.  It was then that I clearly heard God say, “That’s your child – the one that you miscarried.  You have a son.  He’s here with me in heaven.  He’s just fine.  I’m taking care of him for you until you get here.”

I don’t know why God gave me that glimpse of our child.  I’m just thankful that he did.  I’m sad that we didn’t get to raise our son here on this earth, but I look forward to the day when we’ll be with him again – for all of eternity.

If you have lost a baby for any reason, I want you to know that God sees you and He feels your pain. He is holding your baby close in His arms until the day when you can be together again.  He loves you and He wants you to know that your baby’s life matters.  Even if you were the one who chose to abort your baby, He still sees you and He loves you and He feels your pain.  He wants to draw you close and heal your heart.  He wants you to know that His grace is sufficient for you – and for your child.  He wants you to know that your life matters too.

“Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea.  I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband.  And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, ‘Look! God’s dwelling place is now among the people, and he will dwell with them.  They will be his people, and god himself will be with them and be their God.  He will wipe every tear from their eyes.  There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.’  He who was seated on the throne said, ‘I am making everything new!’  Then he said, ‘Write this down, for these words are faithful and true.’ “ – Revelation 21:1-5

  

Koinonia

It’s that time of year – the clock has struck midnight – the old year has gone and the new year has begun.  Everyone is taking stock of their lives – making plans to do things better – searching for the word that will define their new year.  I usually abstain from this kind of activity because it tends to lead to frustration and discouragement when things don’t turn out quite the way I hoped or expected.

However, this year, I do have a word that I want to permeate everything I say and do in 2019.  This word has been percolating in my heart for months now.  And, as I’ve pondered it during the last weeks of the old year and the first week of the new, I have a better understanding of exactly what it means.

I thought that my word for the new year was “community.”  However, after some prayer and reflection, I realized that this English word doesn’t really capture what God has been stirring in my heart.  But, there is a Greek word that does:  koinonia.

Koinonia is sometimes translated as community, but it means much, much more than this single English word.  It is one of those rich words that doesn’t have a pure English equivalent.  As I’ve studied this word, I’ve found that “koinonia” can be translated in many ways:  community, communion, joint participation, sharing, and even joint contribution.

Koinonia is used to describe the state of the early church in the 2^nd chapter of Acts where it says that “They devoted themselves to the apostles teaching and to fellowship (koinonia), to the breaking of bread and to prayer.”  Or, translated another way:  “They committed themselves to the teaching of the apostles, the life together (koinonia), the common meal, and prayers.”

Koinonia is also used in Romans 15 to describe the way in which believers in Macedonia pooled their resources to help the poor in Jerusalem: “ The Greeks – all the way from the Macdeonians in the north to the Achaians in the south – decided they wanted to take up a collection (koinonia) for the poor among the believers in Jerusalem.  They were happy to do this, but it was also their duty.  Seeing that they got in on all the spiritual gifts that flowed out of the Jerusalem community so generously, it is only right that they do what they can to relieve their poverty.”

When we think of community, we usually think of a group of people who live in proximity to each other and who occasionally hang out together and who occasionally call each other when something good (or bad) is happening in their lives and who occasionally worship together.  But, koinonia is more than that.  Koinonia implies deep relationships – communal experiences – collective worship – shared resources.  It represents lives that are interconnected and intertwined in a beautiful way.  It means that someone always has your back.  It signifies looking up to God and reaching out to others – together. 

I think that this is the kind of community that God intended for us to experience as believers.  But, sadly, most of us never achieve this in the context of our local churches.  It’s not for lack of trying on the part of church leadership.  It’s a by-product of our overly-scheduled, excessively-busy, checklist-oriented lives.  Developing a koinonia type of community takes time and energy.  It requires commitment and investment.  It means slowing down and spending time talking and eating and worshipping and praying together. 

My pastor always says that “Lone Rangers are Dead Rangers.”  This statement is so true!  But, many of us have fooled ourselves into believing that we AREN’T Lone Rangers simply because we check in at church on Sunday morning or show up at small group occasionally.  And, while these things are good and necessary, they aren’t enough.  They can sometimes give us the false illusion of having a community.  Because, when it gets right down to it and things start to go south in our lives, we often realize that there’s no one to call – no one to help – no one to encourage us or walk alongside us or pull us out of the pit.

Koinonia (community) doesn’t happen by accident.  It is the result of intentionally sharing life together with others.  So, that’s my goal for 2019.  Anyone care to join me?